This week’s Vibe Check: Monday, March 13th- Sunday, March 19th
Keywords: * Balancing Paradox * Pride Vs Confidence * Compassion *
This week we have major energetic shifts afoot that will leave us each in a state of discomfort. How we experience and process that discomfort is up to us as individuals. But what we will share this week is the call to hold space for fucking up the process- both for ourselves and for one another.
Often in spooky spaces, we hear talk of a ‘healing journey.’ Too often for my liking, this evokes an image of a set path, specific steps, + a destination signaling when the journey is complete. Sprinkle in a bit of self-loathing + purification language, you’ve got a great sourdough starter for a cult.
If only it were that easy! If only growth were linear, aesthetically pleasing, and ended with a guaranteed gold star. But we know that’s not the case, don’t we? ‘Healing’ isn’t even a word I want to use, as it’s been co-opted by capitalist grind culture as another box to tick off on an endless to-do list. The way ‘healing’ is used now implies there’s something wrong with you and that curing it will make you pure. What a great time to sell you something! Again, big cult energy.
"Healing" is gross. It’s uncomfortable, it’s unpleasant, and not at all glamorous. It’s not even mandatory, which is the worst part of it all. "Healing", in a spooky sense, requires incredible courage and resilience. Let's call it "growth" instead.
In order to even begin a process of growth, we first need to take a long, hard look in the mirror and stop lying to ourselves that everything’s fine. You can’t grow from where you refuse to look. Most people struggle significantly with this part of the process. And it doesn’t just happen once. Every time we grow, we step back and recalibrate, but sooner or later we’re faced with a situation that shows us just how far we have left to go.
And that’s okay! The purpose of this week’s energy is to practice showing ourselves and one another grace during the times we fuck it up. You’re not always going to react in line with your integrity, but this week is a chance to meet yourself in the mirror with honesty and compassion. Yes, we’re okay right now, and yes we have a long way to go. The act of fucking up is growth- which is the whole paradox babe. We can only thrive from within our flop era
It's just as important to hold that space for one another this week. You may have no problem staying in your own little bubble, facing your nonsense, and accepting it with looooove. But if someone else lashes out at you over a minor issue- do you judge them, take it personally and fight back? Or, do you notice that as disproportionate and extend grace? How short is the line between points A and B?
New behaviors are like a new pair of shoes- they need to be broken in before it’s comfortable to wear them. Breaking in a new behavior means knowing the difference between a necessary pain that lessens over time + a pain that requires immediate attention.
Long story short: it’s embarrassing sometimes when we’re in the awkward phase of growth. Sometimes our pride gets the better of us and we over-enforce boundaries. It's always embarrassing when we hurt people's feelings in the process of showing up for ourselves. Usually, that happens when we fake confidence to hide how scared we are. Other times, we're so scared after standing up for ourselves, we immediately recant and apologize. Finding the right balance is a long-term project, so be kind to yourself and others.
This week is the time to notice when you or others are acting from a place of awkward growing pains + to respond with kindness. Have an uncomfortable conversation; apologize without spiraling into self-loathing about it. Correct someone who went out of bounds without being cruel. The road to mastery is paved with fuck ups. The only way to build confidence is to allow yourself to fail.
Everyone is going to be in their feels this week, and it will be up to each of us to show compassion for one another whenever possible. Bearing witness to someone else’s stumble is an opportunity to grow a more empathetic and loving community- one day at a time. People act out when they’re uncomfortable or in distress. It’s wise to remember these as signs instead of slights.
It is an honor to bear witness to another’s vulnerability, even when they don’t mean to do so in our presence. Move with care this week, and add some extra gentleness and humor to your days.
Like the vibe of this post and want a reading with me? We chat more in-depth about your specific wonderings with an Astro Chat or Card Session! For the month of March, use code REALONE at checkout for 20% off